PRACTICE

I remember reading once about a newlywed couple preparing their Sunday dinner. The wife was preparing to cook a roast. The husband noticed that his wife cut the end off of the roast before placing both pieces in the roasting pan. He thought that was a bit odd and asked his wife why she did it that way. She explained that is how her mother always did it. A few weeks later, the newlywed couple was having dinner at the home of the wife's parents. The mother was preparing roast. The young husband watched as the mother cut the end off of the roast before placing both pieces into the roasting pan. The young husband asked his mother in law why she prepared the roast by cutting the end off. She explained that is how her mother always did it. The young husband, now filled with curiosity, just had to know why the grandmother prepared roast by cutting the end off. He called the grandmother and inquired.  The grandmother explained, when she was raising the kids, she couldn't afford a roasting pan. She used a small cake pan to cook roast. The pan being so small, she had to cut the end off of the roast in order to get it to fit in the pan. Daughter and granddaughter did it because that is how they had seen it done. Although they had roasting pans and the cutting the end off of the roast wasn't necessary they did it anyway not knowing why. 

There is a statement often repeated in training situations, "Practice makes perfect." The statement isn't actually completely accurate. If I learn to do something the wrong way, and continually practice it that way, I will be doing it wrong although perhaps 'perfectly wrong'. The accurate statement would be, "Perfect practice makes perfect." Are you living your life the way you were taught and it just doesn't seem to be working very well? Did you learn the correct principles? Is it possible, you didn't learn the best way to live life and have been continually practicing how to live life in an ineffective way? Practice does not make perfect, Perfect practice makes perfect!

WINDOWS

Windows are used to view beauty, monitor for danger, cool or warm a room as well as multiple other uses. A window provides a sort of snapshot as to what us going on inside or outside of a building.  A person can act as a window. Early in my work, by simply observing the behavior of a child, much like looking through a window,  I could get a good sense as to what was going on within a family or within a home. Observing the behavior of an employee can be like looking into the window of a business. In a very real way, we are all walking, breathing windows providing the world with a view of what is going on in our homes and relationships. What is the world seeing through your window?

INCONVENIENCE OR GIFT

Our perspective in any given situation can make all the difference. I've heard people complain that with new technology we are burdened with the sights and sounds of suffering from around the world. We are immediately brought to the site of horrific disasters. True, modern technology does make many of the images and sounds of the worlds suffering quite accessible instantaneously. It also makes life changing and monumental moments in history available for us all to be witnesses. Though many complain about the negatives and the horrors, I stand in awe of the amazing and beautiful sites and sounds of this life made available to us via technology. "This ole world we're living in sure is hard to beat, with every Rose you get a thorn, but ain't those Roses sweet?"

FLAG ON THE PLAY

I enjoy this time of year when the evening air takes on a coolness or crispness. It reminds me that here in the United States, we are in the middle of football season. No, not soccer, but oblong, pig skinned, Hiesman trophied football. As I watched games today, my attention was drawn to the referees. Dressed in black and white striped shirts, they are right in the middle of every situation monitoring for rules violations in an attempt to ensure fair play. When there is a violation, the referee blows his whistle and throws a yellow flag into the air alerting everyone concerned that a violation has occurred. The rule violation is articulated and an appropriate penalty imposed. How would we fair if a 'life referee' followed us all day long? We are rude to a server in a restaurant ... whistle blows, flag is thrown and a penalty is imposed upon us for our behavior. We raise our voice to our spouse or with the children ... whistle blows, flag is thrown, penalty imposed. If you had a 'life referee' today, how many flags would have been thrown? How much would you have been penalized for rude or inappropriate behavior today? How fair do you play the game of life? There may not be a 'life referee' following you around (at least that you can see) but you will and are paying a price for violating rules in the game of life. Lets play fair. Lets be a little kinder, a little more patient, a little more giving and reduce the penalties in our game of life. We and everyone else around us will be better for it!

YOU'RE NOT IMMUNE

I frequently caution my children and clients to be careful about with whom they spend their time. There is a basic law of our existence as human beings that states, we become what we think about most and persistently expose ourselves to. As human beings, we tolerate and become accustomed to that which we are exposed to over time. We become like, in behavior, thought and deed, the people with whom we spend the most time. Hang around negative and critical people and you will become negative and critical. Spend a lot of time with upbeat and optimistic people and you become upbeat and optimistic. While doing research for my doctorate I studied and interviewed prominent motivational speakers at the time. Can you guess with what kind of people they spent most of their time? They preferred and sought out the company of positive, upbeat and motivated people. So often we create our own misery because we think that we are immune to the laws of human behavior. I offer this counsel and warning; if you're not living the life you desire, take a look around. With whom are you spending your time? It may explain a great deal. Consider this, vice is a monster of so frightful mien as to be hated needs only to be seen; yet seen too oft, familiar with her face, we first endure, then pity, then embrace. 

GUILT

“Guilt is like table salt. A pinch makes the soup taste great, but a spoonful makes it too salty.

A little guilt makes us reliable, truthful, law abiding, and honorable. Too much guilt makes us hate ourselves and resent others.

Use a pinch of guilt, not a spoonful.”

ADVANCED CIVILIZATION?

Modern technology has made our world smaller and smaller. There was a time in our history when it took weeks for news of world events to reach the general populace. Today, news of world events are received almost instantaneously. In fact, modern technology has literally made us witnesses to major world events. There is so much information available to us now that there are even people and organizations that process the information for us, tell us what it means, and even tell us how we should feel about it. I find it unsettling that the more we allow someone else to process information for us, the less time we spend actually thinking for ourselves. How dangerous is that!? When we no longer think for ourselves, we are so easily lead and 'mislead'! All of the amazing tools, technology and information available to us today should make us an extraordinarily advanced civilization. Instead, given the way we are utilizing all if this, I think we risk becoming the best informed society to ever die of ignorance.